$SQQQ $UBER Uber (never made a profit in 16 years) reports $2.6 billion quarterly loss ($1.25/share $5/annualized) Stocks prices soared on the news as investors were heard to exclaim "Hurry!! You can lose $5 a year and all it will cost you is $28 Whoo Hoo I want to buy as many $5 losses as I possibly can!!"
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